NewYears IED

Thursday, August 8, 2013

Mindful Diaper Duty

Maybe the soul and spirit are one in the same
but the soul comes to earth to play the game.

Part of that game is dirty,
which I'm learning first hand
as my tiny, cute, little precious angel, creates prodigious amounts of waste.

Now, she's cute as a button but I let this remind me that life isn't, or will ever be, just happiness.

There is going to be poop in some form of fashion for eternity. Does Spirit deal with these earthly elements, I know soul does.

I heard some great lyrics by a band called Typhoon,

"we are all alone
in this

I take this as, "yes we have divine origins but when it comes to dealing with less than enjoyable situations, I alone will find myself at the edge deciding how to move."

For example:

No sleep 2 days
Allegra slept all day but has been wide awake since 1, with no end in sight
There moments when I really wanted to throw her out the window.

That's an edge that every parent I've talked to laughs about but admits too. One buddy said the only reason we put up with babies is because they are cute, another heard a threatening sound while breast feeding and in that moment realized that she could kill to protect her child and feel no remorse. All this to say a little baby can bring up strong stuff and it ain't all gonna be pretty.

I have no choice but to take care of the lil monster.
Regardless of how tired or annoyed I am
I must carry on
and do so without throwing the baby out the window.

I can't tell you how similar some of this has felt to military life.

Gotta job to do gotta get it done.

I gotta kid to tend to and there is no choice but to do it. Hense the training. How am I at this new edge, how about when I am physically, emotionally, and mentally drained? Am I good enough,
cool enough, relaxed enough
to calm
a crying,
squirming, little soul?

Monday night was rough, Tuesday was a bit better. Last night wasn't bad at all.

The thing about combat and war is that
for those fighting
there usually is a finish,
a time when the crisis is over.

It hit me last night that having a child never ends.

So I continue the practice.

This post was guided by the 74th stanza of the Art of Peace, a book written by Morihei Ueshiba
Armor Down has a website. Check it out.

Like the AD Facebook page

Try this meditation I created around the seed sounds of the chakras.

Thrive as a civilian.


  1. Love the realness of your post. That little soul will teach you a lot.

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